(no subject)
17 December 2022 09:27![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rooooooshiThe nighttime is really scary. Not because of the monsters that hide in the shadows but the overwhelming hopelessness.
I had to miss a party last night because I was sick. It would have been my first party in maybe a month. A chance to meet new people which I have been interested in doing. But I’ve been feeling a minor illness coming on. I skipped the party to recover because I don’t want to be too sick when I travel to India. First I don’t want those sci-fi temperature gauges getting a read on me and forcing me to quarantine for 2 weeks. Second I would prefer my diarrhea and fever be separate instances instead of one super fucked week in India. Ooh and I need to buy some clothes when I get there.
Literally all night I just thought “I’m going to die alone. I will lose all my friends. No one cares about me and won’t invite me to their parties anymore. Life will be just the same day of sitting in my couch and watching tv over and over again.” Or something like that I can’t remember. I feel like I’m running out of time.
I had to miss a party last night because I was sick. It would have been my first party in maybe a month. A chance to meet new people which I have been interested in doing. But I’ve been feeling a minor illness coming on. I skipped the party to recover because I don’t want to be too sick when I travel to India. First I don’t want those sci-fi temperature gauges getting a read on me and forcing me to quarantine for 2 weeks. Second I would prefer my diarrhea and fever be separate instances instead of one super fucked week in India. Ooh and I need to buy some clothes when I get there.
Literally all night I just thought “I’m going to die alone. I will lose all my friends. No one cares about me and won’t invite me to their parties anymore. Life will be just the same day of sitting in my couch and watching tv over and over again.” Or something like that I can’t remember. I feel like I’m running out of time.
