Yeah actually that’s so hype. Not as worried as before

I’m not worried about being single now. But I’m worried about finding love so late I can’t have kids.

If I didn’t want kids I’d be completely fine rn. I’m still happy working on myself. Finding purpose and hobbies and what I actually want.

I’m in a good mood today. Seems like my mood is completely random. it’s raining too so that’s not a mood decider I guess.

Yesterday was bad. Maybe it’s the darkest just before dawn.

It is really hard to get some sun in this city

I’m not feeling my best today. My thoughts are usually more bothersome on days like this. And then I try too hard to fix it but only in rare cases does it actually help.

I feel behind socially. My mind is telling me I need to meet more people. Make some friends and a girlfriend. But I’m pretty sure if I go out, I’ll feel worse. With the very small chance people make me feel welcome and give me attention and make me happy.

I was having a good last few days. But today I think I pushed the cold exposure too much. But the dopamine, brown fat, cold resistance, and mental toughness is a pretty good deal.

Girls wonder why guys think they’re flirting when they’re just being nice. It’s because guys are all dicks. They’re not nice and nobody is nice to us. So a girl being nice like normal feels amazing. It’s feels like we’re finally being appreciated. It’s sad. There’s like no point of having guy friends.

I’m getting close to being done with parths shit. I think 2 years of living together is enough

girls are nice and I love them

Instead of focusing on how I’m conquering my anxiety and developing myself, my inner mind is worried I’ve never dated. Even though I was literally mentally unhealthy and scared of most people until like a few months ago.

I’m proud of myself and everyone that keeps putting the thoughts in my mind that I’m very late dating and should have a girlfriend don’t know what I’ve been through. No one knows what I’ve been through and how hard I worked to come out of it. It doesn’t matter if I never enter a relationship I’m hype as fuck no one can talk shit about me

Actually just bawled for a good 5 minutes. My thinking brain doesn’t know why but I’m glad my inner self got it all out

Just had a cool theory. We now compromise on our friends because if we wanted to have a conversation about a specific topic, we could just go in the internet to talk about it. So we don’t seek out as compatible as friends as we might have done before because it’s not as necessary.